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Delia Day - Pinch me
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Pinch me
RRJR47: u got me . u just sell stuff.
RRJR47: u r not 4 real
MarkedGirl: I could of sworn I wasn't imagining myself, but you never know.
RRJR47: take care

I wonder what I'm not supposed to be for real? But, as someone pointed out far more astutely in a comment in my journal, I am a masochist, and I do seek out this pain and suffering while searching for those elusive good conversations. You know, the ones where people speak in complete sentences with some semblance of proper punctuation. I keep hoping someone will strike one up that's good today while browsing through the flash at tattoodles.com.

My owner bought me a subscription to that site today, and told me to pick out some things I like to give him an idea for a neck tattoo for me, which is not one I could possibly do myself. He's got a room booked in the quarter weekend after this, conveniently close to my favorite tattoo shop.

Current Mood: creatively moody

Comments
rockstarbob From: rockstarbob Date: October 9th, 2003 02:16 am (UTC) (Link)
Wow, that site has a ton of designs. Do you have any idea what kind you're looking for?
deliaday From: deliaday Date: October 9th, 2003 02:35 am (UTC) (Link)

Ideas

Ultimately, it's not up to me. I'm just saving things I like for him to see. I'm sort of leaning toward something celtic with a cross in it, though. I'm not sure he'll go for that idea or not. He furrowed his brows a bit when I said 'cross', and repeated I should just look for ideas now, which makes me thing he did not like that particular idea very much at all.
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 9th, 2003 06:06 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

You mentioned Delia that you are a masochist. I know you are very devoted to your owner. _______Just out of curiosity, how far would you let your owner go in causing you pain and torturing you?__________ I have heard of slave owners who initially just practice the usual sort of bondage practices on their slave women but gradually over a period of time develop more and more painful punishments for their slaves, eventually crippling their slave women, making them handicapped, and then sometimes even having their slave women killed.___ The slave women go along with this and don't try to escape from this because of their devotion to their owners and because they feel that they cannot live without their owners, so they allow their owners to torture them until they are crippled and handicapped. They even allow their owners to kill them if their owner so desires that.________ I'm just curious, are you that devoted to your owner that you would allow him to cripple you?_____ You certainly seem to have an incredible capacity to endure pain and suffering. You seem to me to be a very dedicated and devoted slave woman who will suffer nearly any amount of pain and humiliation to please her owner.______ I must say you really are a first rate masochist and a first rate slave woman as well as being a beautiful lady.____ The neck tattoo does sound like a good idea, and you also mentioned that your owner was going to have your septum pierced as well so you can wear a lovely septum ring in the middle of your nose, which might indeed look very good with your pretty attractive face! Those are certainly great ideas! ________You seem to be progressing very well in your subjegation Delia. You certainly are a very well trained and obedient slave Delia, my compliments to both you and your master on a job well done regarding your subjegation._______ Just curious though if there is any limits on what you would let your owner do to you in regard to torture and even crippling or killing you, and would you go along with anything he desires, no matter what it is? John
deliaday From: deliaday Date: October 9th, 2003 09:43 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

I think perhaps you've read a bit too much fantasy, and put a bit too much credence into those BDSM urban legends. I don't think you know any of those slave owners you've "heard of". I know many of them. They all find me and strike up conversations, and if there's one thing they all have in common, it's that they are compelling, intelligent, and very responsible people with excellent leadership skills and with healthy, long term relationships they've had for years. Another thing in common is they would also probably take great offense, just like I do for the record, to the implications of what you just said.

That's exactly the kind of ridiculous stereotype born from atrociously bad BDSM fantasy pornography that I try to overcome by putting things in a solid context of reality.

Fantasy has its place, but it always exists in opposition to reality. You can either build a happy, healthy relationship that is mutually beneficial to all as you lead it well, or you can wonder why good obedient "subs" and "slaves" are so hard to find as you search in perpetual frustration for that fantasy.

No matter what vocabulary you adopt to describe your relationship, it's going to fail if it's not mutually beneficial to all.

Girlfriends leave, wives divorce, slaves revolt... and no, I don't really do any "suffering" in my relationship. I find it very good. Refer back to the masochism note. I would find it pretty hard to bear if it were painless. That would be too much suffering for me.

Sadomasochist sex is not "punishment" or "humiliation". It's good clean fun, and at least in my case, very important to a happpy, healthy relationship.

Loyalty, devotion, and subservience, those are entirely different matters that do not have much to do with sex. They have to do with the quality of character of my owner. He inspires them all well in everyone, not just me.

The notion that anyone would go along with anything in any circumstance is not one that's very smart. Just like you can never say never and be right, you can never say always and be right, either.

How, when, where, what, and most especially why all come into play. Every time with every thing they get considered, and it always depends on the answers. It is reality, after all, and in reality to get what you want, you have to have a damn good answer for all of those inevitable questions.
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 9th, 2003 01:18 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

Well I am glad you gave me the answer that you did, it was a very sane answer.______ In fact some owners and slaves are not as sane as your owner and you are, not everyone is nice in this world, maimimg and murdering, unfortunately, does happen, and not just amongst owners and slaves of course.__ War, hatred, the most brutal forms of misogyny, and more cruel forms of S/M are also sometimes real.______It seems to me though that you and your owner have achieved a balance and no how far to take it with each other. That is good. Best wishes to you. John
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 9th, 2003 01:57 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

By the way, I did not mean to be critical when I said that you have achieved a sublime level of subjegation in describing your status as a slave and a masochist. I was just curious to what extent you would allow yourself to be abused. In other words whether you are sane or not, and you seem to be quite sane as well as intelligent. No offense intended.______ Having worked years ago undercover with the police, and having worked the last few years as owner of a taxicab service and driving a cab myself, I have had an oppurtunity to meet all kinds of people; the good, the bad, and the ugly. And I can assure you that not everyone is nice or sane. It is amazing what people sometimes do to each other, the hatred and emotional craziness they sometimes have and the terrible things that they are capable of doing to each other._____ Most people are decent, but I have also seen some very ugly and tragic stuff. John
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 9th, 2003 02:13 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

John, I'm troubled by your world-view. I'm not sure what you're even trying to say. It sounds like you're trying to project your imagined bdsm relationship onto Ms. Day. You ask questions that are articulately, answered in her for-free writings.

Your police/taxicab experience has put you in touch with a given demographic, making decisions about humanity based on this contact is ill-advised.

I have not once heard of a case of a long-time dominant crippling or killing a submissive. Being both a fan of bdsm and true crime I would think I would have run across this but have not. Do you have any cases that we can look into and maybe check out the pathology? I'm interested in seeing how I differ from these mysterious BDSM cripplers/killers.

Steven B. Cherry
seat of the revolution (http://seat.defcode.com)
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 9th, 2003 02:35 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

what about the girl in the box? What about Karla Holmolka and Paul Bernardo? There are plenty more examples of Domination, BDSM gone terribly wrong.
SUE
deliaday From: deliaday Date: October 9th, 2003 03:32 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

I think before you say "there are plenty of others" you should name the first. You might as well say Jack the Ripper was an example of domination and bdsm gone terribly wrong to say that Karla Holmolka and Paul Bernardo were one. Serial killers are an entirely different subject. One sensationalist and hysterical that I don't think is very appropriate here...
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 10th, 2003 03:19 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

There are numerous examples of S/D or S/M relationships gone wrong that can be easily verified including a couple that I have witnessed myself with neighbors in L.A. and Minneapolis. Obviously there are idiots and pyschos in all walks of life including the world of dominates and submissives._________ But Delia's point is well taken. This is a positive website with people enjoying and celebrating the world of S/D, so it is quite understood that Delia wants to keep the conversation here positive. So I will drop the subject. ______ Thanks for answering my question Delia. John
From: (Anonymous) Date: October 10th, 2003 04:16 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Ideas

Steven as far as my world view goes_________ If you read carefully what I said , I said that most people I have met are decent people. Most people are good people, including most people in the Dominant/Submissive world. So my world view is hardly skewed.______ I am however, a realist. There are in fact some very bad people in this world, some worse than others. This is true in the world of S/D too.__ To say everyone in any cubcult or group of people is allways intelligent and allways nice is a fairytail. It simply isn't true.________ But Delia wants to keep this board positive, that I can tell, and yes Steven, our lovely Miss Delia is a remarkably articulate advocate of the world of submissives. She is also tough and feisty you may have noticed. When someone is perceived to be attacking or condemning the D/S lifestyle, she goes on the attack like a tigress in defense of her lifestyle. She may be a submissive but she does stand up for herself , which is healthy. It's those that refuse to debate others on issues that they care about, who are really taken advantage of. I like Delia's passion.___ My lady Carol is much the same way, a beautiful, elegent, feminine woman but a woman who can be feisty when it is something she is passionate about. ___ That is a good trait in any human.____ I get the distinct feeling that Delia's owner must at times have his hands full with Delia when she's feisty, but I'm sure he can appreciate that trait in a woman as I can. John
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subversive slut
Delia Day
User: deliaday
Name: Delia Day
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about this journal

“Is my trail bigger
or is it simply
left to see
as the unabashed facts
of a life lived,
instead of swept away,
conveniently forgotten,
buried
in shallow graves
like the evidence
of crimes?"”_

This journal is a companion to my real Web site, linked from the header of this page. It is the day to day mundanity of life. It is interesting, of course, but not as interesting as the decade long chronology of life there, with more than 8,000 photos from over a decade of my life to see and countless articles to read.

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